I created a presentation for our organizational meetings in the fall where I could offer the concept to our principal owner and the four other general managers in our organization.
The thing is, I report to someone who yells when he’s under pressure (which is most of the time).
He’s not being abusive or insulting, he’s just extremely emotional and loud. I can’t concentrate well enough to answer intelligently when someone is hollering at me.
It reinforced my low self-esteem and self-worth that I couldn’t be as smart as those above me.
Later that night, at dinner, all the other general managers told me they thought it was a great idea and I should do it anyway.
Jordan Belfort, the infamous Wolf of Wall Street, said in his memoir, "I'm insecure and humble, and I embarrass easily... If I had to choose between embarrassment and death, I'd choose death. I really found this to be true on three particular, separate occasions. The third occasion was when I volunteered my number to a cute stranger at a concert in Sydney in 2007.
As a fan, something took over me and I introduced myself to him with little more than a smile, my name and some words of appreciation for his work. Kelsey stood up, asked me about myself, introduced me to his wife and thanked me sincerely from stopping by. She was very warm and chatty and shared her story with me as to how she got started in the culinary business. Most people -- including famous people -- are cool! Sometimes, if you make the first social move and say hello, you might be eradicating two people's nerves. You are giving power to your ego when you worry/overthink. Or as Arianna Huffington calls it, the "obnoxious roommate in your head...
Shyness is misunderstood as aloofness all the time. As a sales professional that goes to a lot of networking events, I have been brushed more times than I can recall. As far as I am aware, I am still alive and well (and certainly more successful as a result of still going for it anyway). Like our values, the qualities that intimidate vary for everyone.
'So what' is one of the greatest things you can ask yourself in this world. Nothing made the need for this article more clear than when someone recently told me that before they met me, they thought I was intimidating. Super friendly, short, always smiling, girl from a small town, me?
But it’s not your job to be his therapist” -- so, if you’re ever tempted to go there, don’t.
Instead, Cohen recommends you try one or more of these tactics:1. “Sitting there with a poker face or a quizzical expression, in absolute silence, is sometimes a good way to communicate that what someone just said -- or, in this case, how loudly he said it -- is offensive to you,” Cohen notes.
The opportunities are abundant when you stop allowing fear to get the better of you.